Copia Magazine: Shooting Down Cupid: Whos This Guy

If you've been following previous episodes then you know
that I was stuck somewhere between Over and Yonder,
swatting flies from the cattle farms, cattle trucks, and local
women. Right. That's what I said. Anyway - I'm happy to
report that I made it back to city life just fine and let me say
it's good to be back home.

This is going to rock! Literally and figuratively; I'm at the Journey - Def Leppard
concert, it's summertime, I'm having a beer in the amphitheater beer garden (aka
the place where a wristband gets you a beverage for $12 and you can't take it out
of the roped area and into the concert seating. WTF? Is this North Korea? No, it's
just an Indian reservation. Weird.). Nevermind. I'm in need of the obligatory $40
concert t-shirt so I'm off to the kiosk.

Well hot damn. Not only is the line short but next to me appears to be a very
attractive (I mean really freakin' hot) gal by herself also in need of a shirt. Maybe
the little tank top in the top corner of the display? After all it sure would look
nice on her. Whatever. I need to break the ice, so once again I start turning the
mental rolodex of potential lines that have probably failed me up to this point
but I really need something good. Seriously - she's that freakin' gorgeous. So I go
for the ol' standby. Or do I? Should I go with "which shirt do you think I should
get?" or the other one? I go with the other one. "Nice tattoo."

Actually it wasn't all that great. It was the standard dark blue barbed-wire job
around her left bicep. But I wasn't really looking at her bicep. I suppose I should
have been looking at her face when she turned to reply (for future reference) but
she seemed to be used to the fact that I wasn't making eye contact. Eventually
we decided on a shirt for me and something for her, and wouldn't you know it I
left for my seat (third row! Yes!) with her phone number.

The concert was phenomenal, aided by a beer, a potential phone number, and
another really hot gal next to me at the concert who talked to me more than her
boyfriend. This was one of those moments that I didn't want to end anytime
soon. Guys - you know what I'm talking about. I feel one of those hot streaks
coming on, the kind that makes up for not having a date in a year or three. These
streaks don't happen often, so you've got to enjoy the heck out of them while
they last.

So I wait the obligatory three days to call her and I get voicemail.
I leave a message. I don't hear back for a week or so, and I decide
to try again. It's not like she was hammered and could possibly be
having regrets about giving me her number, right? I figure she's
just busy - you know, like a single mom of a teenage daughter
who teaches grade school and coaches volleyball. All of this I
of course did not know until I finally talked to her again. Ugh -
"sure, let's get together soon. I'll give you a call." Needless to
say I did not give her a call. Too bad - 'cause she was really freakin'
smokin' hot. But to be my age with a teenage daughter? The math ain't pretty
on that one, and I'm not ready to be the other half of that equation.

Oh I almost forgot. When Journey opened with "Stone in Love" some guy I had
never seen before started singing. It turned out to be the replacement for Steve
Perry's replacement. It was still entertaining, and a great time was had by all,
which is the whole point anyway, right?