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Stay healthy, spend time with friends, find a job you love. These are all great ways to feel happy. Here are some more you may not have considered. Don't get too rich. We all look at all those super rich movie stars and heiresses, who seem to be so desperately unhappy, and vow that if we were that rich we wouldn't have a care in the world, yet studies show that the only time that increased income really makes you happier is when it raises you out of abject poverty. Dan Baker, author of What Happy People Know, suggests that one of the things that makes us happy (a sense of purpose) can disappear when we no longer have an incentive to work. Don't finish what you start. I recently read a book, Mental Traps, which addressed the issue of persistence. It's human nature to want to finish what we start, no matter how little we're enjoying it. Finishing something JUST because you started is a pretty dumb strategy. If we bite into a rotten apple, we tend not to eat the rest of it, but if we start a personal project that turns out to be really boring we often think, "If I don't see it through, I'll have wasted the time I already invested in it". Technically, if you see it through you'll have wasted a lot more time (This also applies to relationships and career paths, but that is way beyond the scope of this article). Give some stuff away. Being disorganised and having too much clutter around can really bring your mood down. Helping others in need makes us feel better. Giving some of your clutter away to a good cause is the ultimate "two birds with one stone' mood lifter. Scare yourself silly. You may have heard the advice "Do something that scares you every day", and thought "Why?" (I know I did). Turns out it's good advice. We need to feel a little bit challenged every day. It's good for our mental health. Too little stress is as detrimental to our happiness as too much. That's one reason why unemployed people can feel just as stressed as overly busy people. (Another is lack of money of course, but see above - all things in moderation!) Read a really depressing book. This is my own personal tip and (as far as I know) has no scientific basis. I was recently reading "My Sister's Keeper". I don't think it's too much of a spoiler for those who haven't read it to disclose that it's about a child with a serious, life threatening illness. Someone asked me why I was reading such a sad story and, although it had never occurred to me before, the first thought that came to mind was 'to make me appreciate how much I have to be happy about". I realized I read a lot of books (and watch a lot of movies) that deal with some pretty dark subject matter. It also occurred to me, for the first time, that this could be closely linked to how grateful and blessed I feel every day. Make sure you spend some time being miserable. This may be counter-intuitive, but think about it. Happiness is relative. There is no happiness without unhappiness. Just as there is no satisfaction without hunger, and no 'bursting with energy' without 'tired and drained'. I'm not suggesting that you purposely make yourself unhappy. Just that you recognize unhappiness for what it is. A contrast to happiness. You really can't have one without the other. |
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